That’s right. I’m an addict, and my drug of choice is Praise. I’m thinking I need to work the 12-step program to overcome this. Step One: “I admit I have a problem. I am powerless against my addiction to Praise, and my life has become unmanageable.”
I was once a successful marketing executive, at the top of my field and loving my job. Lately, I’ve spent quite a bit of time and energy coming to terms and getting comfortable with who I am now — my new role in life that’s dominated by being Wife and Mom, with just a smattering of freelance work that comes up when we seem to need the money most. It’s been good, and I’ve really tried to stay focused on doing what is best for my family and this part of myself, too.
Here’s the problem: I am going through massive withdrawals. There’s no Praise to feed my addiction. My days are spent busting my ass to care for my family, and I’m lucky to have the opportunity to do it. But no one says to me, “Wow, mom! Dinner was awesome,” or “Great work on the laundry,” or “Thanks for dropping everything and bringing the lunchbox that I forgot at home this morning.” There are no staff meetings at which I can sheepishly bask in the admiration of colleagues. No client presentations that conclude with enthusiastic approval of the project.
My best friend, a psychotherapist, once cautioned me about my addiction to Praise and it being my “thing” to overcome in this life. She pretty much nailed it on the head. I get it, and I can beat this addiction with a little effort. So, I find it a mean turn of circumstance that a covetous job opportunity — rife with all the temptation of praise that it offers — presents itself.
This company has wanted me on their staff for awhile. A friend that works there had told me I could pretty much write my own ticket. The CEO said he’d be willing to be flexible and let me work 3/4 time since I have family obligations. It would mean pretty good money for basically part-time work. But it would also be a lot more juggling and not as much time or energy for my family.
I keep thinking about my addiction, and the inherent sin of temptation, and wondered if this job opportunity was coming up as something to tempt me back into that old habit of seeking praise and feeling that “high” I used to get from being “awesome” at work.
And I think it’s time to quickly move on the other steps, because I can’t allow this addiction to Praise to rule my life again.
So for now, I am Beverly: woman, wife, mother, daughter and friend first. Once I can overcome my addiction to praise, I can again someday be Beverly: writer, marketer, strategist and executive.
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